peace in the valley
by sciencekitty
Summary: What if Bette had gone to TIna for comfort instead of finding Candace?


"Monster," she whispers forcefully as she slaps Faye Buckley away.

The host touches her leg comfortingly under the table and it's all it takes to remind her that she's still on the air, that she's still in public, and that she needs to act appropriately.

After quickly composing herself, she rises to her feet abruptly, thanks the host for his time and rushes off the stage and into the back where everything is a blur except for her forced smiles and insincere assurances that she's okay and the soothing touch of Tina's hand squeezing hers.

Bette automatically makes a beeline for the driver's side, but Tina deftly removes the keys from her wife's hand and puts her foot down when Bette raises a challenging eyebrow at her.

She doesn't fall apart when they get into the house.

She doesn't.

She won't.

She's Bette _Fucking_ Porter, and she _will not_ cry because some right-wing nut job used the details of her personal life against her.

But then Tina places a cup of tea in her hand and nudges her into the bedroom and Bette thinks about how she's kind of been picturing them keeping their baby boy's bassinet next to their bed for a while before moving him to his nursery and then she thinks about how he's gone and how it's all her fault.

She sinks onto the end of the bed and stares at the wall, absently sipping at her tea until Tina kneels in front of her.

"Baby?"

Worried hazel eyes watch her carefully.

Bette doesn't have the energy to respond, and Tina tries again.

"Baby, I think you should lie down for a while, ok?"

Encouraged when Bette nods, Tina rises to her feet and gently takes the teacup from her wife's hands and sets it on the nightstand nearby.

"Alright," she says, turning back toward Bette, "let's get you into something more comfortable."

Instead, Bette reaches out and catches Tina's hips, maneuvering the blonde in front of her and resting her forehead on Tina's belly.

They're both silent until Bette's shoulders begin to shake and Tina feels her heart twist.

"Oh, Baby…" Tina trails off softly. She rests her hands on the brunette's back and then begins to rub comforting circles into it while she cries.

Before long, Bette's sobs subside into steady breathing, but when Tina goes to pull away, Bette's grip only gets tighter.

The brunette is silent for a few more moments before she finally says out loud what she's been thinking for weeks.

"I'm so sorry, T."

Tina's brow furrows as she cups Bette's face in her hands and gently forces her wife to look at her. Bette drops her grip on Tina's waist and finds the blonde's wrists, rubbing her thumbs over the backs of her wife's hands as her eyes fill with tears again.

"If I would have been here for you, if I would have been home, if I would have taken better care of you," Bette lets the sentence hang for a moment as Tina's eyes widen with realization, and then quickly finishes her thought, "maybe we wouldn't have lost him."

Tina gasps out loud.

"Oh, _Baby_."

She presses a kiss to Bette's forehead.

"_No._"

Tina lifts Bette's hands to her mouth and kisses each wrist, each palm.

"Bette, you have got to listen to me," she searches her wife's eyes for a response, but Bette gently shakes herself loose and falls back onto the bed, curling up into a ball.

"Bette, no."

Tina crawls onto the bed and lies facing her wife, touching her forehead to the brunette's.

"Baby, the doctor had to tell you. It was nothing we did. You couldn't have stopped it, and I couldn't have stopped it. It just happened."

"But if I was here," Bette insists stubbornly, tears leaving tracks down her cheeks, "and you weren't alone all the time –"

"Baby, stop."

To Tina's surprise, Bette actually obeys. Watery dark eyes patiently wait for her to continue, and Tina brushes a lock of hair behind the brunette's ear.

"What were you going to do differently Sweetheart," the blonde poses affectionately, "keep me in a bubble?"

The corner of Bette's mouth turns up at the thought and she laughs as she wipes at her eyes, making Tina smile.

"We'll try again," the blonde declares firmly, "We still have sperm left at the cryobank, and in a few months when we're ready, we'll try again. We'll have a family. We will. It's just going to take some time."

She looks down at their hands and threads her fingers through the brunette's, hesitating.

Bette notices and uses a foot to softly nudge her, "What is it, Baby?"

Tina sighs and bites her lip.

"It's nothing."

Bette tucks a curtain of blonde hair behind Tina's ear. "T?"

Tina lifts her head to meet Bette's concerned look.

"It's just….if we're going to try again, it would be really nice to have you home more often if you can manage it."

Bette raises an eyebrow at her and then smiles. "I promise to try my very best."

Tina exhales gratefully. "Yeah?"

Nodding, Bette leans in to kiss her. "Yeah."


End file.
